Why Chinese shouldn't have Christian names...

Anne Chang
(Mandarin)-Dirty

Anne Chin
(Mandarin) - Keep quiet

Faye Chen
(Mandarin) - Dusty

Carl Cheng
(Hokkien) - Buttock

Monica Cheng
Hokkien) - Touching your buttocks

Lucy Leow
(Hokkien) - You are dead

Jane Tan
(Mandarin) - Frying eggs

Suzie Leow
(Hokkien) - Lost till death

Henry Mah
(Mandarin) - Hate your mum

Corrine Tai
(Hokkien) - Poor fellow

Paul Chan
(Mandarin) - Bankrupt

Nelson Tan
(Mandarin) - Bird laying eggs

Leslie Tong
(Mandarin) - Rubbish bin

Carmen Teng
(Hokkien) - Leg hair long

Connie Mah
(Cantonese) - Call your mother

Danny See
(Hokkien) - Squeeze you to death

Rosie Teng
(Hokkien) - Screws and nails

WHAT IS MARKETING????

1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: ' I am very rich. Marry me! ' - That's Direct Marketing'

2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: ' He's very rich. 'Marry him.' -That's Advertising'

3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day, you call and say: ' Hi, I'm very rich. 'Marry me - That's Telemarketing'

4. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a
drink, you open the door (of the car)for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then say:'By the way, I'm rich. Will you 'Marry Me?' - That's Public Relations'

5. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says:'You are very rich! 'Can you marry ! Me?' - That's Brand Recognition'

6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: 'I am very rich. Marry me!' She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. - ' That's Customer Feedback '


7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: 'I am very rich. Marry me!' And she introduces you to her husband. - 'That's demand and supply gap'


8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tell her: 'I'm rich. Will you marry me?' and she goes with him - 'That's competition eating into your market share'


9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say: 'I'm rich, Marry me!' your wife arrives. - ' That's restriction for entering new markets '

Funny?

MAHATHIR stands for:

Must
Always
Hantam
Abdullah
Till
He
Is
Removed

退后 lyrics =)

天空灰的像哭過
The sky is gray, as if it has cried
離開你以後 並沒有更自由
After leaving you, I am not any more free
酸酸的空氣 嗅出我們的距離
The sour air produces the smell of our distance
一幕最新的結局 像呼吸般無法停息
The newest result is like breathing, unable to cease

抽屜泛黃的日記 找到了回憶
The yellowed-diary in the drawer has found its recollections
那笑容是夏季
That smile resembles the season of summer
你我的過去 被算是真的忘記
Our past can really be considered to be forgotten
缺氧過後的愛情 如星的眼淚是多餘
The lack of oxygen after love is like the tears of stars, it is unneccesary

我知道你我都沒有錯
I know that neither of us are at fault
只是忘了怎麼退後
We just forgot how to retreat
信誓旦旦給了承諾 卻被時間撲了空
Our oath made its best effort, but it allowed time to make it empty
我知道我們都沒有錯
I know that neither of us are at fault
只是放手會比較好過
It is just that it will be better if we separate
最美的愛情回憶裡待續
The most beautiful love is the type that we carry on in our memories

天空灰的像哭過
The sky is gray, as if it has cried
離開你以後 並沒有更自由
After leaving you, I am not any more free
酸酸的空氣 嗅出我們的距離
The sour air produces the smell of our distance
一幕最新的結局 像呼吸般無法停息
The newest result is like breathing, unable to cease

抽屉泛黄的日记 榨干了回忆
The yellowed-diary in the drawer has found its recollections
那笑容是夏季
That smile resembles the season of summer
你我的过去 被顺时针地忘记
Our past can really be considered to be forgotten
缺氧过后的爱情 粗心的眼泪是多余
The lack of oxygen after love is like the tears of stars, it is unneccesary

我知道你我都沒有錯
I know that neither of us are at fault
只是忘了怎麼退後
We just forgot how to retreat
信誓旦旦給了承諾 卻被時間撲了空
Our oath made its best effort, but it allowed time to make it empty
我知道我們都沒有錯
I know that neither of us are at fault
只是放手會比較好過
It is just that it will be better if we separate
最美的愛情回憶裡待續
The most beautiful love is the type that we carry on in our memories

我知道你我都沒有錯
I know that neither of us are at fault
只是忘了怎麼退後
We just forgot how to retreat
信誓旦旦給了承諾 卻被時間撲了空
Our oath made its best effort, but it allowed time to make it empty
我知道我們都沒有錯
I know that neither of us are at fault
只是放手會比較好過
It is just that it will be better if we separate
最美的愛情回憶裡待續
The most beautiful love is the type that we carry on in our memories

Jokes Anyone? lolsz~

Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
He wanted cold hard cash!

What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
"Is that you mommy?"

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frosbite

How do crazy people go through the forest?
They take the psycho path

What do prisoners use to call each other?
Cell phones

What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk

If Mr. and Mrs. Bigger had a baby, who would be the biggest of the three?
The baby, because he's a little Bigger!

Where do bulls get their messages
On a bull-etin board.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an oral test.
Speaking specifically about manic depression, she asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?"
A young man in the rear raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"

So you want a day off. Let's take a look at what you are asking for. There are 365 days per year available for work. There are 52 weeks per year in which you already have 2 days off per week, leaving 261 days available for work. Since you spend 16 hours each day away fron work, you have used up 170 days, leaving only 91 days available. You spend 30 minutes each day on coffee break which counts for 23 days each year, leaving only 68 days available. With a 1 hour lunch each day, you used up another 46 days, leaving only 22 days available for work. You normally spend 2 days per year on sick leave. This leaves you only 20 days per year available for work. We are off 5 holidays per year, so your available working time is down to 15 days. We generously give 14 days vacation per year which leaves only 1 day available for work and I'll be darned if you are going to take that day off!

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start.
So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake.
I feel better already.

During their silver anniversary, a wife reminded her husband: Do you remember when you proposed to me, I was so overwhelmed that I didn't talk for an hour?" The hubby replied: "Yes, honey, that was the happiest hour of my life."

A young couple gets married, and the groom asks his bride if he can have a dresser drawer of his own that she will never open. The bride agrees. After 30 years of marriage, she notices that his drawer has been left open. She peeks inside and sees 3 golf balls and $1,000.

She confronts her husband and asks for an explanation. He explains "Every time I was unfaithful to you, I put a golf ball in the drawer." She figures 3 times in 30 years isn't bad and asks "But what about the $1,000?"
He replied "Whenever I got a dozen golf balls, I sold them"

The English Language is Difficult

Non-English speaking countries sometimes go out of their way to communicate with their English-speaking tourists:

Cocktail lounge , Norway :
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.

At a Budapest zoo:
PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY.


Doctor's office, Rome :
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner, Japan :
COOLES AND HEATES: IF YOU WANT CONDITION OF WARM AIR IN YOUR ROOM, PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF.

In a Nairobi restaurant:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.

On the grounds of a Nairobi private school:
NO TRESPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION.

In Aamchi Mumbai restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO.

The best!!! In a Tokyo bar:
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.

Hotel , Japan :
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS

Hotel, Zurich :
BECAUSE OF T HE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS.

A laundry in Rome :
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.

Tourist agency, Czechoslovakia :
TAKE ONE OF OUR HORSE-DRIVEN CITY TOURS - WE GUARANTEE NO MISCARRIAGES.

Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand :
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong :
GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE.

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen :
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.

The best!!!! In a Japanese cemetery:
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.

A poem taken from my Email box~

Every college are greedy,
Sini sana all need money,
Their pocket kosong our perut noisy,
I am poor because they sucks my money.

Exam question full of difficulty,
It has a reason only,
Which is to earn more money,
Because we retake money masuk lagi.

The staffs always no aksi,
They did wrong never say sorry,
Before asking please show your money,
Otherwise they wont be happy,
We pay their salary still make us angry.
That’s why i wanna study hard to earn more and more money.

Tiap-Tiap hari feel so lazy,
Never try to wake up early,
Always hope college sekarang cuti,
Everyday go class feel sleepy.

Lecturer always scold me lazy,
Do assignment just like to copy,
Before the final just feel worry,
Every nite study until crazy,
Because scared scold by mummy.

Why my class always no pretty,
Those elephant always show me how she’s sexy,
The monster wanna treat me nicely,
Like that i better mati.

My looking is damn ugly,
Saya mari girl girl lari,
Everyday date them they say busy,
Semua orang tak ada hati,
Make me always so lonely,
Only can watch porno movie.

This is just a small story,
Feel funny and happy,
Actually i am not lonely,
Because I have many friends around me.

Lamborghini Reventón

The Lamborghini Reventón (pronounced: reh-ben-TON) is a mid-engined sports car that debuted at the 2007 Frankfurt Auto Show. It is currently the most powerful and expensive Lamborghini road car to date, costing one million euros.

Initial reports suggest that the 6.5 L V12 may receive a power boost of approximately 10 horsepower (7.5 kW), bringing the new output to 650 horsepower. In spite of this, and the car's carbon fibre components, the Reventón accelerates to 100 km/h (62 mph) in the same time as the Murciélago LP640 (3.4 seconds). The car is capable of reaching a maximum speed of over 340 kilometres per hour (211.3 mph).

The Reventón is named after a fighting bull in keeping with Lamborghini tradition. The bull, owned by the Don Rodríguez family, was best known for killing famed bullfighter Félix Guzmán in 1943. Reventón means "explosion" or "burst" in Spanish, when used as a noun. In automotive terms, it means "blowout, flat tire" when used as a noun. When it was used as the name of a bull, however, it was intended to be interpreted as an adjective a quality or property of that bull in particular. Then Reventón means "he who seems to be about to burst".
















Although the exterior is all new, almost all the mechanical elements (including the engine) are taken directly from the Murciélago LP640. The exterior styling was inspired by the F-22 Raptor.

"The Mom Song"

Get up now
Get up now
Get up out of bed
Wash your face
Brush your teeth
Comb your sleepyhead
Here's your clothes and your shoes
Hear the words I said
Get up now! Get up and make your bed
Are you hot? Are you cold?
Are you wearing that?
Where's your books and your lunch and your homework at?
Grab your coat and gloves and your scarf and hat
Don't forget! You gotta feed the cat
Eat your breakfast, the experts tell us it's the most important meal of all
Take your vitamins so you will grow up one day to be big and tall
Please remember the orthodontist will be seeing you at 3 today
Don't forget your piano lesson is this afternoon so you must play
Don't shovel
Chew slowly
But hurry
The bus is here
Be careful
Come back here
Did you wash behind your ears?
Play outside, don't play rough, will you just play fair?
Be polite, make a friend, don't forget to share
Work it out, wait your turn, never take a dare
Get along! Don't make me come down there
Clean your room, fold your clothes, put your stuff away
Make your bed, do it now, do we have all day?
Were you born in a barn? Would you like some hay?
Can you even hear a word I say?
Answer the phone! Get off the phone!
Don't sit so close, turn it down, no texting at the table
No more computer time tonight!
Your iPod's my iPod if you don't listen up
Where are you going and with whom and what time do you think you're coming home?
Saying thank you, please, excuse me makes you welcome everywhere you roam
You'll appreciate my wisdom someday when you're older and you're grown
Can't wait till you have a couple little children of your own
You'll thank me for the counsel I gave you so willingly
But right now I thank you not to roll your eyes at me
Close your mouth when you chew, would appreciate
Take a bite maybe two of the stuff you hate
Use your fork, do not burp or I'll set you straight
Eat the food I put upon your plate
Get an A, get the door, don't get smart with me
Get a grip, get in here, I'll count to three
Get a job, get a life, get a PHD
Get a dose of,
"I don't care who started it!
You're grounded until you're 36"
Get your story straight and tell the truth for once, for heaven's sake
And if all your friends jumped off a cliff would you jump, too?
If I've said it once, I've said at least a thousand times before
That you're too old to act this way
It must be your father's DNA
Look at me when I am talking
Stand up straighter when you walk
A place for everything and everything must be in place
Stop crying or I'll give you something real to cry about
Oh!
Brush your teeth, wash your face, put your PJs on
Get in bed, get a hug, say a prayer with mom
Don't forget, I love you
And tomorrow we will do this all again because a mom's work never ends
You don't need the reason why
Because, because, because, because
I said so, I said so, I said so, I said so
I'm the mom, the mom, the mom, the mom, the mom!!
Ta da!!!

LiGhTs ^^

Brazil

Chicago

Cleveland

Cologne Cathedral

Copenhagen

Denver

Las Vegas

London

Los Angeles

Moscow

Niagara Falls

Oakland

Paris

Petersburg

Singapore

Toronto

Vienna

Washington

Malaysia

ALAMAK!! Black Out again -_-"

Super Duper Kawaii Taiwanese!

Cool Animals? or Weird o.o"

The Philippine Tarsier

The Philippine tarsier, (Tarsius syrichta) is very peculiar small animal. In fact it is one of the smallest known primates, no larger than a adult men’s hand. Mostly active at night, it lives on a diet of insects. Folk traditions sometimes has it that tarsiers eat charcoal, but actually they retrieve the insects from (sometimes burned) wood. It can be found in the islands of Samar, Leyte, Bohol, and Mindanao in the Philippines.
If no action is taken, the tarsier might not survive. Although it is a protected species, and the practice of catching them and then selling them as stuffed tarsiers to tourists has stopped, the species is still threatened by the destruction of his natural forest habitat. Many years of both legal and illegal logging and slash-and-burn agriculture have greatly reduced these forests, and reduced the tarsier population to a dangerously small size. If no action is taken now, the Philippine tarsier can soon be added to the list of extinct species.

Star-Nosed Mole

The Star-nosed Mole (Condylura cristata) is a small North American mole found in eastern Canada and the north-eastern United States. It is the only member of the tribe Condylurini and the genus Condylura.
It lives in wet lowland areas and eats small invertebrates, aquatic insects, worms and molluscs. It is a good swimmer and can forage along the bottoms of streams and ponds. Like other moles, this animal digs shallow surface tunnels for foraging; often, these tunnels exit underwater. It is active day and night and remains active in winter, when it has been observed tunnelling through the snow and swimming in ice-covered streams. Little is known about the social behavior of the species, but it is suspected that it is colonial.
The Star-nosed Mole is covered in thick blackish brown water-repellent fur and has large scaled feet and a long thick tail, which appears to function as a fat storage reserve for the spring breeding season. Adults are 15 to 20 cm in length, weigh about 55 g, and have 44 teeth. The mole’s most distinctive feature is a circle of 22 mobile, pink, fleshy tentacles at the end of the snout. These are used to identify food by touch, such as worms, insects and crustaceans.

Red Panda

The red panda, panda being the Nepalese name for "small, cat-like animal," belongs to the order Carnivora. Its classification into a specific order is not complete. Scientists are seeking to resolve the confusion through DNA analysis. Recent studies suggest that red pandas are equally related to three different groups of animals that include skunks, weasels and raccoons. The red panda is the only species in the subfamily Ailurinae.
The red panda is named after the fiery color of its long, soft coat. The coat’s red color serves as camouflage to blend with the red lichen that occurs in fir trees of China. Coloration for the upper parts of the coat are rusty to deep chestnut while the underside is darkest in color. The coat is comprised of long, moisture-shedding guard hairs and a dense undercoat of insulating gray-brown wool. The muzzle, lips, cheeks and ear edges are white, and dark red-brown tear tracks run from the eyes to the corners of the mouth. The limbs and underbelly are glossy dark reddish brown to black. The red panda has a bushy, non-prehensile tail that makes up two thirds the length of its body. The tail is faintly marked with dark red-brown rings.
Thickly furred soles of the feet are adapted for walking on snow and ice. Excellent climbers, red pandas have pinkish-white claws that are half sheathed and semi-retractile. The red panda has an enlarged radial sesamoid bone on its forefoot wrist that is opposite its other digits. This "extra thumb" enables the red panda to grip and hold slender branches and leaves in its forepaws.
Red pandas are primarily crepuscular animals, sleeping and relaxing during the day in trees or fallen logs, and foraging for food on the forest floor at dusk and dawn. When asleep, the red panda curls up on a branch with its nose tucked under a hind limb and its tail. They have also been observed in a sleeping position much like the American raccoon, sitting on a branch with head tucked beneath its chest and between their hind feet. On particularly warm days, red pandas can be seen fully stretched with belly pressed on a limb and legs dangling.

Pink Fairy Armadillo

The Pink Fairy Armadillo (Chlamyphorus truncatus) or Pichiciego is the smallest species of armadillo (mammals of the family Dasypodidae, mostly known for having a bony armor shell). It is approximately 90-115 mm long excluding the tail, and is pale rose or pink in color. It is found in central Argentina where it inhabits dry grasslands and sandy plains with thorn bushes and cacti. It has the ability to bury itself completely in a matter of seconds if frightened.
The Pink Fairy Armadillo burrows small holes near ant colonies in dry dirt. It feeds mainly on ants and ant larvae near its burrow. Occasionally it feeds on worms, snails, insects and larvae, or various plant and root material.

Frilled Lizard

The frilled lizard is obviously designed for climbing, it is a large slender species, two thirds of its body length are made up by its tail. It has a brightly coloured (often blue) frill which is most of the time folded against the neck, it may be extended at times of courtship or alarm. This is a relatively dull coloured lizard, a background of grey or brown with irregular darker marks.
Lives in Australia and Papua New Guinea. Eats Gutloaded insects (crickets, locusts, waxworms, morios, etc).

Yeti Crab

Yeti Crab (Kiwa hirsuta) is a crustacean discovered in 2005 in the South Pacific Ocean. This decapod, which is approximately 15 cm long, is notable for the quantity of silky blond setae (resembling fur) covering its pereiopods (thoracic legs, including claws). Its discoverers dubbed it the "yeti lobster" or "yeti crab" .
The ‘hairy’ pincers contain filamentous bacteria, which the creature may use to detoxify poisonous minerals from the water emitted by the hydrothermal vents where it lives. Alternatively, it may feed on the bacteria, although it is thought to be a general carnivore. Its diet also consists of green algae and small shrimp.
Although it is often referred to as the "furry lobster" outside the scientific literature, Yeti Crab is not a true lobster but is more closely related to squat lobsters and hermit crabs. The term "furry lobster" is more commonly used for the genus Palinurellus.

Axolotl

The Axolotl may not a common pet, but it is very unique. The axolotl is a type of salamander, native to Mexico. It’s scientific name is Ambystoma mexicanum. The common pet or laboratory Axolotl refers exclusively to A. mexicanum, although in Mexico the term Axolotl is used in reference to several species of Ambystoma, and is considered an edible food source!
The Axolotl is neotenic, meaning that it doesn’t routinely undergo metamorphosis from the larval to adult form, as happens with most other salamanders. Instead, the larval form (with gills) becomes sexually mature and reproduces, maintaining a strictly aquatic life style. Under some circumstances, the Axolotl can undergo metamorphosis into a terrestrial from, although this can be stressful on the animal.
The Axolotl has amazing regenerative abilities - if injured, even to the point of losing a body part, the Axolotl will heal readily and even regenerate lost bits. They are fairly hardy creatures that can be expected to live up to 10-15 years with attention to proper care, particularly with respect ot water quality. Their skin and gills are very sensitive and quite soft, so handling is not recommended any more than is necessary. Because they can exchange air through moist skin, they can survive outside of water for short periods, as long as their skin is not allowed to dry out.
Juvenile axolotls can be cannibalistic towards each other, so they are best raised in separate enclosures. Adults can potentially be housed together but watch for cannibalistic tendencies. Of course, if a body part gets bitten off by a tank mate, an axolotl can regenerate it over time.

Angora Rabbit

The Angora rabbit is a variety of domestic rabbit bred for its long, soft hair. The Angora is one of the oldest types of domestic rabbit, originating in Ankara, Turkey, along with the Angora cat and Angora goat. The rabbits were popular pets with French royalty in the mid 1700s, and spread to other parts of Europe by the end of the century. They first appeared in the United States in the early 1900s. They are bred largely for their long wool, which may be removed by shearing or plucking (gently pulling loose wool).
There are many individual breeds of Angora rabbits, four of which are ARBA recognized. Such breeds include, French, German, Giant, English, Satin, Chinese, Swiss, Finnish, to name a few.
Angoras are bred mainly for their wool because it is silky and soft. Most are calm and docile but should be handled carefully. Grooming is necessary to prevent the fiber from matting and felting on the rabbit. Because they are prone to hairballs, they should be groomed everyday or every other day. A condition "wool block" is common in angora rabbits and should be treated quickly. Sometimes they are shorn in the summer as the long fur can cause the rabbits to overheat.

Dumbo Octopus

Also known as the "Grimpoteuthis", is a benthic mollusc found on the ocean floor at depths of 300-400 meters. Dumbo octopuses, which can grow to up to 20 centimeters, are soft-bodied or semi- gelatinous octopuses with a pair of fins located on their mantle and webbing between their arms. Grimpoteuthis swim by moving their fins, pulsing their webbed arms, pushing water through their funnel for jet propulsion, or all three at once. They can swim up off the bottom and hover a bit just above the seafloor looking for snails, worms, and other food.

Emperor Tamarin

The Emperor Tamarin (Saguinus imperator) is a tamarin allegedly named for its similarity with the German emperor Wilhelm II. The name was first intended as a joke, but has become the official scientific name.
This tamarin lives in the southwest Amazon Basin, in east Peru, north Bolivia and in the west Brazilian states of Acre and Amazonas.
The fur of the Emperor Tamarin is predominantly grey colored, with yellowish speckles on its chest. The hands and feet are black and the tail is brown. Outstanding is its long, white mustache, which extends to both sides beyond the shoulders. The animal reaches a length of 24 to 26 cm, plus a 35 cm long tail. It weighs approximately 300 to 400 g.
This primate inhabits tropical rain forests, living deep in the forest and also in open tree-covered areas. It is a diurnal animal, spending the majority of its days in the trees with quick, safe movements and broad jumps among the limbs.
The Emperor Tamarin lives together in groups of two to eight animals. The oldest female leads the group above several mature males. The mutual grooming plays an important role for bonding and socializing. The animals often associate themselves with other tamarins like the Brown-mantled Tamarin. It has various cries which help them to promptly recognize interlopers.
The diet of the Emperor Tamarin is similar to that of other tamarins. It is an omnivore, primarily eating fruits, insects and sap. It also eats bird eggs and small vertebrates (such as tree frogs). Due to its small weight it can reach food at the far end of branches, which are not accessible to heavier animals.
The Emperor Tamarin lives a polyandrous life, i.e. the mature female mates with all of the males of her harem. Gestation is 140 to 145 days, and births are typically twins (although triplets happen on occasion) as is typical of tamarins. All the males, father or not, help with the birth, care, and support the young, carrying them and bringing them to the mother to nurse. At approximately three months they are weaned, and towards end of the second year they are fully mature. Its life expectancy is over 15 years.