Thursday, August 06, 2009

Singlish vs English

Use Singlish. It~{!/~}s so much cheaper.
Why do we insist on using the Queen~{!/~}s English?
Singlish is so much more economical and effective?
Compare and see!


When going shopping...
Brit : I~{!/~}m sorry, Sir, but we don~{!/~}t seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
S~{!/~}porean: No Stock!

When returning a call...
Brit : Hello, this is Mr Bean. Did anyone page me a few moments ago?
S~{!/~}porean: Hello, who page?

When someone is in the way...
Brit : Excuse me, I~{!/~}d like to get by. Would you please make way?
S~{!/~}porean: Lai, siam! Or Siam, hor! Or Skius!

When someone offers to pay...
Brit : Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
S~{!/~}porean: no need lah

When asking for permission...
Brit : Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
S~{!/~}porean: (while pointing at door) Can pass or not?

When asking to be excused...
Brit : If you would excuse me for a moment, I have to go to the gents/ladies. Carry on without me, it would only take a moment.
S~{!/~}porean: Go toilet. Buay tahan ahh.....

When doubting someone...
Brit : I don~{!/~}t recall you giving me the money.
S~{!/~}porean: Got meh?

When disagreeing on a topic of discussion...
Brit : Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you~{!/~}re coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the policy.
S~{!/~}porean: Talk cock lah you!

When asking someone to lower their voice...
Brit : Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice, I~{!/~}m trying to concentrate over here.
S~{!/~}porean: Eh, Tiam leh!

When asking someone if he/she knows you...
Brit : Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time. Do I know you?
S~{!/~}porean: See what see?! BUAY SONG AH?!

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